Appreciation

A few weeks have passed since my last blog post, yet I see topics that could be written about on most days…..it’s just finding the time to sit and write! The last month has been largely taken up by attending the Universal Medicine courses and workshops that were held in England over the month of June and were preceded by the retreat in May.

I have been attending the Unimed events for 5 years and of course, repeating the same courses will mean that some aspects are repeated, yet no 2 courses year on year are ever exactly the same. Whilst elements of a course may be repeated they do not come scripted but are delivered according to the energy of the group that presents.  Even though something may have been said before or in a similar way, I hear it in a new way, it sinks in deeper or I am just more open to hearing it. Sometimes as human beings we can get a bit arrogant and think we’ve heard it all, we know it all and attending these workshops can be an exercise in true humility to realise just how little mankind really does know about life, God and the human condition and how ignorantly and arrogantly we live on a daily basis. I for one have certainly lived in that way for most of my adult life. Of course I also have to watch that I don’t bring that arrogance into life in a different way – by thinking that I am somehow better than others who have not chosen the esoteric way! The fact that we are all equal is one of the core tenets of the esoteric teachings and is known by all who re-connect to their inner heart.

I love Esoteric Philosophy and each time when I think Serge must have reached a limit, what more can be said, he delivers a deeper understanding, a new level of unfolding for us all. Of course that is naturally so when one is tapping into the never-ending font of wisdom that is the soul, but on a human level, it seems and is amazing. However, the esoteric is not just about acquiring knowledge about life, about God, about the human condition but is very much about living it, putting the teachings into practice, living in a way that is loving and caring for self and all equally to the best of one’s ability – nothing more and nothing less. The thing is it can be a bit of a shock to realise, accept and acknowledge just how far away we have been living from a way that is truly caring and loving!!

I recall one of my many challenges to Serge in my first year attending Unimed, saying this is ‘all being a bit too precious’  when there was a discussion going on around the effects of different foods on the body. I thought to myself, ‘I’ve eaten whatever I liked all my life and I’m still here, I’m still living and well,’ (albeit I was several stones overweight – so you can get an idea of just how arrogant I was!) He patiently explained how as one becomes more aware, one feels more clearly the true impact of certain foods on the body and expanded further on this. Although I had my doubts and skepticism, so much of what Serge said with regard to life, God and the human condition, resonated as truth with me that I began to put the teachings into practice. In doing so, I have come to realise and know for myself that what he was saying about food is true.  I can now feel for myself the detrimental effects of eating certain foods that before I was just so numb and unaware that I did not register them – even though they would have been still harming me.  

So it wasn’t a case of this ‘all being a bit too precious’ but the fact that I had not been precious enough (in the true meaning of that word) with myself throughout the years of my life and ongoingly. It hurts to realise just how lacking in love, care, tenderness and preciousness I have been with myself and as a consequence, with others also. Indeed, in order to not feel that hurt, it was easier to defend that which I have always done, to maintain the hardened ways and behaviours, to challenge the esoteric, to ridicule it for being ‘too precious’ rather than stop and truly feel what I have done to myself. However, it is not about beating oneself up for errant ways of the past for that would not be loving either. It is a step on the healing journey to feel what we have done to ourselves by living in ignroance and unawareness of our true nature. The deeper truth is that we are Love despite all errors and mistakes and the more we connect with that Love, that Truth, then the hurts are healed, melted and dissolved.

One of the topics covered in the recent workshops was commitment. Do we just engage with life or are we fully committed to life? Do we only give so much, go so far but pull out if it gets too tough? Do we equate commitment with how much effort we put in rather than by considering whether we were fully present in it? I felt at one point that yes, I wanted to live fully committed but at the same time I wanted to have a get out clause too – so that I didn’t have to be 100%  responsible 100% of the time!  It was a good opportunity to realise where I was at and reflect on that…that whilst I might be committed in my head to life, to love or living the esoteric way for example, was that really true and reflected in how I live my life?  And clearly the answer is no. There is a difference between where I might think I am and where my lived reality is. That is good to know as it gives me something to work with, rather than being in the illusion of imagining I am somewhere I am not!

We are only as committed as our lowest level of commitment – so far example, if someone feels they are very committed to work but less so to family life or relationships then their level of commitment is at the level they are at with family/relationships. Again, the point is not to beat ourselves up when we realise we have been living less than fully committed but to take stock of where we are at and then we can move forward. It is much more entrapping if we are in the illusion of thinking we are committed to life, to love, when our lived reality says otherwise. Being committed is being and bringing all of you, the true you,  to everything, with no area of life lesser than another. It is being the full and whole you wherever you are and whoever you are with….not the fragmented, self-doubting, judgemental version that we often bring instead. The more we are able to do this, then we are also more allowing of whatever is happening and where others are at, we are more accepting of ourselves and others and more understanding of the whole situation. This helped me to accept, allow and understand where I am at with regards to commitment to life and love or my lack of it,  to look at the things that hold me back, the fears and insecurities, (the ‘what will they say’ scenarios), my preparedness to take responsibility or not and so on, to declare the perceived barriers.

The thing is I can now see (thanks to Unimed SEH 4) that all of that is done from within the human being and the human spirit. The latter are the ones that find all the reasons, all the excuses, all the barriers, all the things that hold us back and perpetuate the loveless ways. But if I connect with the innermost part of me, there are no barriers, no excuses, no reasons to hold back – there is only Love that lives to respond to the call that is called for, that is prepared to do what it takes to answer the call. The question was asked, how far are you prepared to forego humanity to answer the call that is called for? How far are we prepared to go to assist our brothers and sisters? If I stand as the human being or the human spirit there are a million and one ‘reasons’ to not go very far at all, but if I connect with my innermost, the soul, those reasons dissolve in the absoluteness of Love that holds me and all others equally to say ‘I’ll go all the way, I’ll do what it takes to answer the call.’  Of course that might sound like a few nice words to make me sound good or just a fanciful idea that will never come to fruition. Time will reveal whether it is a truth that I fleetingly tap into now and then or whether it is a truth that I come to live from and that forms the compass of my life and my choices. However, I am clear on this – that it is my choice, that it will require initially daily conscious effort on my part to overcome the momentum of my past choices in order to keep choosing love over disregard, love over hurt, committment over apathy, such that I may live fully committed to life, love, God and all that that entails. 

I feel very fortunate to have beside me (Serge Benhayon) in this life someone who already lives that way, who is fully committed to life, to the livingness of Love, to humanity and to God and all that that brings, who has been a consistent loving presence no matter what rotten tomatoes I have thrown at him! This is not a sickly adoration of a guru, for Serge is not a guru and he is the first to say he’s not perfect – he’s an accomplished student of life who has walked this road many times and this is just a simple but deep appreciation for all that he has brought and continues to bring through Universal Medicine which has transformed and enriched my life beyond measure. No amount of money can bring the riches of love. Indeed nothing outside of oneself can deliver those riches for they have to be reconnected to and lived by each of us to bring forth their fruits. However, we can and do learn by reflection and we can be inspired by feeling and seeing those ways in another – so thank you Serge for all that you bring, for being an inspiration and a true reflector of love and light.

Feel free to share your experiences of Serge and Universal Medicine. Have you been inspired to alter your way of living? How has your life and well being been affected since attending Unimed and putting the teachings into practice?